Hannah Murray, best known for playing Gilly on Game of Thrones, has written a memoir detailing her experience with a wellness organization that led to a psychotic break and hospitalization.
In The Make-Believe: A Memoir of Magic and Madness, Murray describes how she was introduced to an "energy healer" named Grace while filming Kathryn Bigelow's Detroit. At 27, dealing with the emotional toll of intense scenes, she found the healer's promises of transformation appealing.
What started as wellness sessions escalated into classes where Murray was asked increasingly bizarre questions - like describing what it felt like to be "holding on to pillars of light." The language is familiar to anyone who's watched the wellness industry's drift into quasi-spiritual territory where pseudoscience meets self-help meets something darker.
Murray eventually suffered a psychotic break that required hospitalization. She was subsequently diagnosed with bipolar disorder, though she's clear in the book that the "wellness" practices exacerbated and possibly triggered the episode. The relationship between mental health vulnerabilities and exploitative wellness culture is something she explores with admirable honesty.
Now 36, Murray has stepped back from acting and avoids meditation, crystal shops, and yoga - recognizing how pervasive wellness culture has become. "I was on this hamster wheel of, 'Where's the thing that's going to make me feel special forever?'" she told The Wrap. "I was looking for a magic wand or silver bullet."
The memoir arrives at an interesting cultural moment. The wellness industry, worth hundreds of billions globally, faces increasing scrutiny over its pseudoscientific claims and potential for exploitation. Organizations that promise healing, transformation, or enlightenment often target vulnerable people seeking solutions to legitimate struggles.
Murray's story is particularly valuable because she's neither dismissive nor preachy. She understands why she was susceptible, acknowledges her own agency in the choices she made, and recognizes that the line between "wellness practice" and "cult" can be uncomfortably blurry.
The book also functions as a de facto exit from the entertainment industry. Murray makes clear she's done with acting for now, focusing instead on writing and her own mental health. It's the kind of honest assessment you rarely hear from performers - an acknowledgment that maybe the thing you were good at isn't the thing you should keep doing.
